For myself...

I can't help but think about the message / reasoning behind my accident. On the real, I really feel like my life after I fully recover will be so completely different than I've ever lived it before... I'm already seeing the changes now....

1) What I depend my happiness has changed completely. It's a way more simplified-watered down-stripped version of everything I used to base it on before. A lot of it was my association with people/titles/achievements and when you have that stuff stripped from you for reasons you can't control, you learn that life goes on and you ARE ACTUALLY A PERSON that exists outside of that world...

2) Constantly feeling the need to "keep busy" or from what I see now, grow up too fast, can literally kill me if not done with respect to mySELF. I notice I was driving myself (ha, driving) towards an unhealthy lifestyle that despite reaching my goals, was sucking the fucking LIFE out of me. Live life slower, basically... what the fuck is the rush?! You notice/appreciate so much more living otherwise.

3) I have way way way way more appreciation for the little things ... no, actually every single thing/person in my life and life itself. No joke. A simple decision saved my life that day.. and I hope that this appreciation will never wear off for as long as I live. Ever.

4) I realized how really impatient I am (esp. towards other people)... its probably one of my ugliest traits.. Having a disability takes a LOT of patience, with yourself and other people... I'm glad I realized it now so that I can rid myself of this disgusting trait. Patience, Patience, Patience.

5) I'm a lot more fearless / confident now after overcoming all of this and that excites the hell out of me. With my personal self, I noticed how much I gave a shit about what people thought about me... when (I don't know why I didn't realize this before), everyone whose opinion I worried about really didn't give two shits anyway. "those who mind, don't matter and those who matter don't mind" seriously.

6) The power of getting rid of the "I DO ME" mentality. That was my life mantra for God knows how long, but I realize that, that selfishly (atleast for myself) shuts out a lot of people for whatever reason and allowed me to run away from a lot of things. I naively thought I don't need anyone but myself, but shit, what a fucking joke.

7) Live my life responsibly, with way more integrity &self-respect. A lot of growing up accompanied this healing process... Giving up and cutting out a lot of people / activities / things in my life. Really living with a purpose to share. Thinking thoroughly about doing ANYTHING now. Becoming stronger in FAITH.

Basically, I am humbled to the max after all of this. Changes changes changes will continue to take place in my life. I want to live my second life the right way...

Goodnight folks :)