Thoughts on college.

College is by far, the craziest time of my life.

I hate it, I love it, I revel in the crazy nights out at ridiculous hours only to wake up in a few hours to get to class in time. I get sad. I am hurt by people. I worry. I've learned responsibility & purpose. I've lost friends and gained many. I've been in near death experiences. I've grown a thick skin. I've achieved goals I never thought I'd achieve. I've tried & failed, many times, but I've triumphed 10x more. I've made mistakes. At the end of the day, as Andy Warhol put it, "Life a series of images that change as they repeat themselves."

Having dinner with Devika last night made me realize how much she and I have changed (for the better) the last three years. College has truly been the funnest & wildest time of my life, and after this, its on to the real world of 9-5 workloads and family & career building (whatever that is). With that, why waste the most amazing time of our lives doing things and being around people that honestly don't make us happy? Force us to regress into negative spaces? Bring negative energy into our lives?

I hate drama, never liked it, never was for it and I try my best to stay away from it (though it seems to always come to me). With association with many different things comes drama, undoubtedly. But I've reached a point where, it is what it is. People CHOOSE their destiny, if you can't hack it, then you should have been more responsible, you should have thought it through just a little bit more, but people KNOW that already. WE all do, including myself, and I too am at fault with this. We're all old here, no need for "lectures".. I was never one to call out anyone for how they lived their life (unless it was negatively affecting MY life or those I care about) but personally, if you didn't have those people who did look out for you and brought you back to your senses & reminded you OF WHO YOU REALLY are and that your conscience DOES exist, how would the world be?

As Naomi Campbell said recently.."I don't want people to agree with me if they don't agree with me. I've had my share of yes people--but they are no good, they are enablers" I appreciate this quote so much and want to live my life with this in mind. I have an opinion because I care and want to stand up for myself when shit ain't right. Not because I'm a bitch, but because I care about the people close to me, whether they realize it or not. My friends are a reflection of ME and I only want to surround myself with amazing, compassionate, respectful people who simply work hard and remain grounded and do well. Sometimes I feel, women too often don't say what they want and never get to get their point across or really ask themselves, "Is this really who I am?" It's easy to get lost, especially in this big city, in this crazy time, I am often lost myself... But stay true to yourself. Demand nothing less than RESPECT. Have a backbone. Have an opinion. Be modest. Set standards for your life. Stay focused! Respect people around you but more importantly, know that at one point, YOU GOTTA GROW UP.

Sometimes, I wonder whats kept me where I am, but I remind myself daily that I am in control of myself and this life of mine. It's all a work in progress.. change is good. 8)

-Cammille